|Jeremiah 29:11 Chalkboard Print by Lily & Val.|
If I had it my way, I would still be living in downtown Pittsburgh. When my lease was up last summer, I cried. Literally. Downtown Pittsburgh might be the pits for some people and others don't understand why I loved it so much, but it was my own little slice of Heaven. However, if I was there now, I wouldn't get to have this experience of living with my brother. If you haven't caught on to this yet, Eric is seriously my best friend. We should have been twins, if only so he wouldn't have had to spend that first year without me. I wouldn't have the freedom to not be paying a ridiculously high rent payment every month on top of my student loan payments. I'm sure for those two reasons alone, I would have started to resent that location eventually and because I'm not there, it's still a little Heaven in my eyes. Do I want to move back? Of course. But now isn't the time.
2) No job is below you.
I recently took on another job of bartending just to be able to make a bit more money with tips and another little paycheck. Why? Because who doesn't want a little wiggle room when bills start rolling in? And while bartending is great, this job also has a waitressing aspect to it, which I have never done before. Do you know how awful people treat waitresses? Yeah, that's why I never waitressed before. Not like retail is much more glamorous, but at least there isn't half-eaten food involved. But not taking a job that most people would say is "below" me is stupid. Does it give me money? Do I technically get a workout in while at work because of how much running around I do? Am I physically able to do this job? Yes. So while I don't need a Master's degree to figure out how to put in an order for Chicken Alfredo and then sweetly hand it to someone, everyone could do with having a job that teaches you how to serve someone. Serving someone else and expecting little to nothing in return is honestly what everyone in this country should have to do for at least a year in my own opinion. I might as well get my year in now.
3) MJ is greater than the man of my dreams.
If you know MJ personally, then you know that he has three things in mind. Career. Family. God. Not necessarily in that order, but that's about it. From the beginning of our relationship, he has made it clear that he wants to be married and have a boat load of children, and I have made it clear that I don't want either of those things until I feel totally set and complete on my own and then after that, I'm all in. If you remember my 25 before 25 list, I wanted to get engaged this year. However, that was with the ideal in mind that I would have a steady full-time job and I would be living on my own before he proposed. Obviously he was on board for this, and we were on this track up until I was no longer employed by Dress for Success because of some unforeseen financial difficulties on their part. MJ told me on Valentine's Day about how he had planned to propose. Way to lay it on thick, right? And to make you love him more, it was going to be at the party for his parent's 40th wedding anniversary, which is the exact same way my dad proposed to my mom. Yeah. That would have been last month. But this man. THIS. MAN. My man has put me and my desires first, yet again. He knows I would not be happy being engaged without feeling complete on my own, so his dreams of a wedding and little family are set aside for my dream of a career. I am selfish and I do not deserve him. But I thank God for him everyday and always will.
4) I have the skills and power to make my dreams come true.
You guys, I am so excited to finally announce what I've been working so hard on! This Thursday, be sure to check back because everything will be explained, I will need your input, and I really hope that you are as excited as I am.
5) God has perfect timing and a plan greater than any of my own.
Thursday's announcement is a big deal for me and I don't think it would be happening if the mess of this year didn't happen. This has been a seriously rough road since graduation. From the high of graduating, to the low of leaving Pittsburgh, high of being employed by one of my favorite non-profits, to losing that job for reasons that I had no control over, to the mess of moving again to Erie, and struggling on the job hunt train, this past year has had it's great moments, but overall, it has just been rough. But through it all, I know God knows what he's doing. He has a plan for my life and while I choose my daily steps, he is guiding them and working in and in spite of them to make things happen. I trust in him to get it right when I am certainly messing it up. Is Thursday's announcement the end all, be all of God's plan? Probably not, but it is certainly his doing. I had this in mind for much, much further down the road in life and it has made it's way to the present. I also want to make clear that other ventures are not being let go because of Thursday's announcement, but they are on the back burner. This has made it's way to the front of my mind and for good reason and I'm putting my trust in God that it will work out.